(Oksana Stolyarenko) I was contacted by Tatyana Stolyarenko on Dream Mates which I had posted a profile. She wrote:
My name Tatyana. i like you profile and you photo nice. are you still look for partner? i live ukraine. my ad not correct location. i not know how change. :( i would love come US and meet nice man. i told nice man in Tennessee. :) i like meet mature man so hope not mind age difference. i 25 but very mature my age. i not like experiences from younger man. too many play game. i seek serious relation and want meet partner, not pen pal. so if you interest, please reply me. i think if we to write once, we allow then send private email address right? send for me you email if possible. Love Tatyana, I replied with a short note stating I could be interested and she could write me at my email address. The next day I received this letter:
Hello John! :) thank you for you reply :) i very happy you reply me. :)) i like mature man because they wise and more serious about life and family. this important to me. I speak and write English pretty good, but not perfect. I learning very fast. I do not have a computer at home and can not click to hyperlink either. :( I register with agency to send and receive e-mail when need . When I not able to reply quickly, this is problem. It cost some to send for email in ukraine. Please not worry about I forget to you ok. :) I am look for a sincere relationship. Men my country are most time drunken or do not want make commitment and to have family. I only 25 year, but I very mature and I learn most about home and family value from parents. i have for one brother. I would like to start a new life and have family of own. I speak to my parents and they wish best for me, but my dad dont believe possible sometime. He think I silly to find happiness on internet. He think no man in other country will send for me and that man only to play internet. This not stopped me. I register with agency that can make for my documents, visa, tickets, etc. This my dream! :) I told my father of what I planning, and costs, and he cannot afford for costs. Agency can make for me visa and plane fair under special program for students. It called foreign student exchange. I would be allowed into foreign country for 3 months. If I become married or obtaine work visa, I could stay longer or stay for always. I dont want to scare you away with marriage of course. :) But I want to be sincere and honest with you of what I want in life, and hopefully, we match. I think i need only look in you eyes once, and I think then I know for sure about heart :~). If I to arrive and it not work for us, I at least make chance meet you and try make a life with you once. I would really like to meet partner in other country. I have friend who put ad like my ad and meet for her soulmate. She then fly to other country to meet her partner. They become married and plan for family together. They live California. I would love for this to happen me too. :) I am very dedicate, honest and treat partner with great sincerity. I hope that you sincere to meet because I would love to meet person who has sincere heart also. If you are sincere with meeting and want woman with good value and respect to you, and to know place as woman, maybe you reply to me again, and that we meet possibly. I dont have any doubts or hesitation about my choice to make this step in life. I know this what I want. And if could, I would leave today to meet my partner and i not be scared this chance take. :~) I ask if you interest me, that you not to write for other girl. I not jealous, but I give all my heart and effort to decision and want same from partner who interest me. I am client at agency that can help me with leave Ukraine to meet partner. my cousin also work this agency and am wait for hope to meet my soulmate and leave very soon. Once my account pay, I can leave less 2 weeks. So you see how to serious I am I hope. :~) Where exact you live and exact work you to do? send to me you telephone and i can to call you. I do not have phone, but I may have chance to use friends phone or call box if you sincere want to meet. I have chance call you in my next day i think. Love Tatyana, not forget send you telephone... i look forward speak you :) With the letter I received this picture: I knew that something was wrong when I received the second letter asking for money. I went ahead and played along to see what was going on. I did include my telephone number and as I thought there was not telephone call. I wrote back: Hi Tatyana; You wrote one of the most refreshing letters I have ever read and I want to thank you for your honesty and openness. I found it most refreshing and rewarding to find a woman who knows what she wants and is not afraid to go after it. I appreciate your photographs, they are most beautiful or I should say you are most beautiful. My question Tatyana is this, if you and I decide to get married will you be just as open and frank then? One problem I have with American women is their passivity, never willing to share what it is they want expecting the man to guess for them. I never was any good at guessing or reading minds. I am open to the idea, I have taken chances before, not with marriage though; maybe I did as it turned out, (smiling) but let us communicate and discuss our likes and dislikes and see what happens. Do not allow this to dampen your enthusiasm any for I am just as eager as you. Hopefully you can leave Kiev before winter arrives or even fall. But we do need to consider the age and what it is each of us is wanting out of life. At your suggesting I will remove my profile from Dream Mates, I am like you a one woman-man. As I mentioned in my first letter, I was in your country and I was also in Russia several years before in the Bryansk Area; your observation and mine are about the same in terms of the drinking behavior of your men and some of the women. But then I have never been subjected to such poverty before and am not sure what I would do under the same circumstances. I am a psychologist and I always try to keep that in mind. I am so overwhelmed by your beautiful letter that I find it difficult for me to put into words what I want to say. I keep going back and re-reading your letter. You said that you are a student, what area are you studying in? I would like to know your dreams and hopes in all areas; I think it is the job of a good partner to assist his wife in becoming the best that she can be and I certainly would want to support you in that endeavor. I am a most patient person with a very even temper; I doubt if we are married 50 years you will ever see me lose my temper and then I would not loose it at you. I live in Memphis, Tennessee, which is in the southeast of our country. It has a population of over 1,000,000 people and it is very diverse in its population. We have about 7 different universities here, including one Medical school with a teaching hospital. You might know it as being the place where Elvis Presley was born if you like rock and roll; or the city where Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was shot if you have read that in history. It is a music city, the blues and rock and roll originated here in Memphis. It is a beautiful city located on the Mississippi River. When I was in Kiev I realized how similar the two cities were. We are far enough south that we do not have hard winters, very seldom will you ever see snow or frost as you call it. But we are fortunate enough to have all 4 seasons of the year. The biggest difference between Kiev and Memphis is the fact Memphis is a flat country where Kiev had many rolling hills. I did build my calf muscles up walking up and down the streets. I have been a Psychologist for several years, at the first of June the clinic I was working in was sold to another group and they closed it. I have yet to determine exactly what I want to do. I had thought about taking early retirement and then find other and different work. Really seriously considering teaching. But I am just now finishing up from the closure and have not determined what I will do. What happens between you and I might determine what I do for a job. I have no intentions of permanently retiring ever. I have too much energy and I enjoy working with people too much for that. I am glad you mentioned that you are very dedicated to your marriage or partner. I really was concerned about this and thought long and hard before I wrote you. There have been too many men and women who come to this country after getting married and as soon as their time was up and they had their citizenship they divorced. I was not interested in a short time marriage arrangement. I have been single now for 9 years and have been cautious but find myself also very lonely and wanting someone in my life to share it with. As with you, when I make a commitment it is for life unless something drastic changes. I will let you know right off hand that I am not looking for a domestic partner, one who can clean house and cook. I find that I am most able to do so and really enjoy doing it. I think all should be shared within a marriage and the two work together to make the marriage stronger. I am a generous person and will give all that I am to another and all that I have. I am certainly not possessive in that way. You will notice that I am a very open and honest person. You are right I can not tell a lie because it shows too easily in my eyes. I am afraid that the only way I could hide something from someone is to wear dark glasses because once they look into my eyes they know everything. It happens to be one of my biggest faults I am afraid. I will make a deal with you Tatyana as you asked. I will not write nor will I date while we are writing to each other. I will give you all my emotional energy and in the meantime I will make arrangements for your arrival. If you are who you say you are I see no reason why we would not get along splendidly. In fact I think it might turn out to be a fairy tale come to life. One thing you have my word on and that is I will do everything in my power to make it work and that is all I ask of you. Your letter has certainly caught my attention and my imagination and I will do nothing to hinder what I feel until we give it a good try. My phone number, xxxxxxxxx house; my cell number is xxxxxxxxxxxxx. I would like for you to let me know when you will call because sometimes I do not answer my home number now that I am not working. I do not remember what pictures were posted so I will send two and hope they are not the same as the ones you saw.Love, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx The second day I received this letter and pictures
Hi John! :) THANK YOU FOR VERY NICE PHOTO YOU!!! :p)))) Thank you for reply ;))) i very glad you sincere!! I really want meet and hope we to find happy future. i hope you for sincere. you not say much in you letter. :( In begin relationship, I want to tell to you all. So I start with let you know about problem with my account status and I to reach close to deadline. I not expect you help me pay to process so that we to meet, but i hope you to consider if it really you want meet to me. Well, more information me. I am 25, Ive never be married and I not have children. I live city Kiev in Ukraine with parents in apartment house. I have a dog I love very much. she name Putts. :) She is very pretty and cute. I do not have a computer or telephone at home. My father suppos to buy telephone soon but it is big investment in Ukraine to have own phone. I use my friend telephone when can. Its not easy for me to get around because have no car, and life here not hold many promise. I a very romantic person by nature i think. and i believe in real love. I looking for my soulmate and I know that if search for real love I will some day to find, even this way use internet. :) I optmistic and I have good sense humour, I full of energy and love and ready to share my life with someone special. I am belief comit to one man. I would like find a man who some like my father and with his value. Although many young man try talk to me, I more interested in secure man who is good knowlegable, kind, loving and true to me. I will never leave a man like his, not matter to age or to looks. i not this shallow. My country condition much different. A woman is not common to leaveman. Its usually other way around. And the woman goes on for long time after by herself. With meet you, I am not seek citizenship in you country. I want to be happy like all people. I want chance in life to be good wife with good family. I can be very happy with husband who love me no matter age or look. i think man worry about this too much when eet to me, so they i not have chance show to he that they handsome or special to me for many reasons. not only one or two. I just expect that man respects me and loves me and family and take me out sometimes :~). But mostly, I want to help my man as he probably works really hard to support me and family. I dont like games. and I not play games. I am very honest and i think considerate. I have very good heart and I dream alot bout love. Each night I hold my Teddy. But now I want hold my man. :) I want to spread wings as woman and I want to do this with man who love me and protect me always. I know I be taking my chances with a new an, but in life we can find no happiness unless we willing to take chance. So I can say, I have trust that you will love me and protect to me, at least will do all to earn you love and I hope you will spend some time letting our love grow together when we to meet. I not looking for casual friend or penpal. Correspondence is expensive for me and so I take it very serious. I do not want play on internet. I want to tart my life with partner. I dont know what else to write you about myself. If you have questions, I will answer to my best. Please remember, I cannot always reply very next day. E-mail is expensive for my poor budget, besides, I hope we can save some conversation for when we should meet or that I may to call you sometime from friends or agency. :) ou can ask me everything and we may have chance be together to build life, a family and fulfilling both our dreams. I get so excited about this life. :)) I want you to think of me as I would think of you. We do not have to be apart. Why should we? Life very short. I want as many years with my partner as possible. Your heart will tell you. If my fate, of what believe to be fate is right, your heart may belong to me even now... ;) Am I right? ) i hope so. When I am meet to you, I should tell you, that I will not let you go easily. If you good to me, I will not let you go at all. ;) Im not like some woman, who bounce from one guy to the next guy. I give EVERYTHING in my heart to make my relationship work. I have only had 2 boyfriends in all life. They were both too immature. But I hurt for a long time after each. I dont want to through again such immature relationship or to hurt this way again. There is way we can to meet very soon. In my process, I can obtain visa and obtain place in student exchange program to meet you in you country. My process is 1790 usd. I have not to prepare for this cost. It is almost impossible for income in Ukraine make this costs. :( I only to hope you able help me with agency cost for process. :) i receive cost of living check after 30-days from program for 1100 usd, and then for 2200 usd next 30 days. I can to repay you with this fund once I arrive. In case you want know more about process, i already tell agency send to you details. you should receive soon. My deadline to process is come soon and i hope i find right love, because i ready to leave ukraine now. :) With all love, Your Tatyana... I will call to you in my next day if this ok. :) i look forward speak to you :) I received the following letter from the agency the same day:
Dear sir: My name is Ekaterina Smirnova, account manager for Tatyana Stolyarenko, our client. She has asked us to send you some information regarding the processing of her account. We understand that you may be interested in her arriving to your country to meet with you. Tatyanas account costs is $1790. This will cover all of her legal documents, visa and travel costs. Please be aware that Tatyana has a deadline of June 27, 2002, to begin her process to your country, otherwise she will need to reapply. This deadline is mandated by government department sponsoring these programs, not our office. To reapply, her process could take between 6-10 months to be reapproved again and there is no guarantee that she would be approved once again. Tatyana is currently in preapproved status and can be made ready in 5-7 working days time from start of process. Because she is quite close to her deadline, if you decide you want to sponsor her, please inform us right away via e-mail, and we will forward the information on how to make payment arrangements, etc. Meanwhile, we will need the name of the International Airport you would need Tatyana to arrive to. Once we retrieve payment, Tatyana will be processed and ready for travel to your country within 5-7 working days. For your convenience, Ive included a breakdown of cost below: Service Description Cost Open Acct Preparation of New Account 300 Visa Enrollment Foreign Student Exchange 200 Qualifying Process Process confirmation of physical test, interview and background checks 100 School Registration Enrollment to school w/30 day waiver to attend 300 Airline fee Tickets to any International Airport 640 Misc/fees Embassy, E-mail and various other process fees, etc. 250 CURRENY = U.S. Dollars Grand Total 1790 Tatyana will arrive on Student Visa status. However, she will not be obligated to begin any schooling for 30-days. This means if you two would like to become married or engaged and reapply for marriage visa or fiance visa it will supercede the restrictions of student visa. Tatyana is looking for serious relationship with you of course. She does not expect more than that. Our process is simply an avenue to put you two together. Do not worry, we will be sending many instructions, along with all of your options as packet with Tatyana, both in English and Russian language. If you have any questions, please feel free to forward them via e-mail. Sincerely, Ekaterina Smirnova, Account Manager I wrote back the following letter: Hello my dear Tatyana; I want to thank you for your prompt response, I must admit that I am writing with great hesitation. You had mentioned that I did not say much in my first letter, I beg to disagree with you. I noticed the questions that I asked were not answered. Let me get to the point. There is a saying in my country and I am sure that it is in yours also. "If it sounds too good to be true then chances are it is not true." I would be willing to help you out and see what happens between us without questions asked. But at the time that you wrote I did not realize you had such a short time frame. We have exchanged only two letters and you are asking me for over $1,700.00. The money is no problem, but my guess is that if I sent you the money or to our agency I would not hear from you or ever see you. I am very much aware that scam artists have been working from your country and the other countries of the former Russian Empire. It is very easy to find a name, picture and information bout us in many of the singles registries across the Internet. I do not mean to imply that you or your agency is operating a scam; the fact is I simply do not now you well enough to make a judgment. All I have is two letters and two pictures, which does not in any way give me enough information to make any kind of judgment. At the same time I wonder how many more you have written. As I mentioned, I would be most willing to help but looking at the facts I am wondering what is going on. There is a big age difference between us, you asked nothing about me in order to make a value judgment. I am aware of the economic situation in your country but I also know that young or old women are not so quick to give up common sense and take such a leap as to visit a person they know nothing about. There is no doubt that you are a very attractive lady, and perhaps it is your attractiveness and the photo of you in a bathing suit that caused me to be so skeptical. I think I would be a fool to pass up an opportunity to make a life with you; but I also think I would be a fool to send that much money without any proof that what you say is correct. I am very much aware of the student exchange program; my youngest son participated in it when he was studding French. I do apologize for being so blunt but considering that we have only two months until your deadline I must be in order to make an intelligent decision in the matter. I know that in order for a student to participate in the program their government must first sanction it. The agency that sent me the information was in no way related to the Ukrainian Government. My dear, if you can help me out on this matter and bring some clarification I would greatly appreciate it and maybe we can work something out. Love, John "Learn the difference between important facts and unimportant facts." - Napoleon Hill Needless to say I never heard from her again. She must have forgotten what I looked like because two weeks later she again contacted me by Dream Mates.